[sudo-discuss] "Free as in sexist?" Free Culture and the Gender Gap

[Mike Schachter]

Thanks Jenny, I really liked that article. One of the things that struck a
chord with me was how aggressiveness and defensiveness are encouraged in
the programming community as positive traits, but also serve to discourage
many prospective members from joining that community.

I would associate that sort of aggressiveness, which I've both exhibited
and experienced, with "Moral Anger", a feeling that I was Right and that
people's opinions were wrong because they did not agree. It's a very
motivating emotion that compels me to try and convince someone of my
opinions, usually by raising my voice and bringing up emotionally jarring
rationale behind why I am right. If through this I compel people to either
agree or leave the discussion, it ultimately makes me think I "won",
probably boosting my testosterone levels - a nasty positive feedback loop.
I consider it a bug, not a feature, of my brain.

The one night I was at sudo room for a weekly meeting, I was impressed by
what I perceived from a female sudo member as actively choosing to not
engage in argumentative discussion, and discouraging the playing of devil's
advocate by another member. It was eye-opening and heartening to see
someone actively choose not to escalate the discussion, and instead look
for a more productive means of conversation.

I've seen so often that conversations about simple things quickly turn to
heated arguments where anger plays a dominant role in communication. Is
there any mode of thought or movement out there to actively reduce the role
of anger in discussions and compromise? Certainly people would benefit from
such a change in mentality. Perhaps emphasizing the role of understanding
and compassion in place of anger and argument, especially by people who
typically focus on the latter, would be progress in that direction.

 mike




On Mon, Oct 28, 2013 at 11:19 AM, Jenny Ryan <tunabananas at gmail.com> wrote:

> Hi all,
>
> A few weeks ago, I participated in a panel on Women in Wireless at the
> International Summit for Community WIreless Networks in Berlin. The
> presenters were excellent, and I found the audience wonderfully receptive
> and engaged with the issue of women's participation in wireless networking
> communities.
>
> Among the points I emphasized was the need to expand the definition of
> 'geek' to include for instance language geeks, theory buffs, writers,
> critical thinkers of whatever medium, etc. An expansive and inclusive
> notion of hacking is something the sudo community upholds admirably well, I
> think. At the same time, our radically inclusive approach brings about the
> danger of excluding those who do not feel safe or welcome in the presence
> of certain behaviors, and as such means we must continually work to
> cultivate safe space<https://sudoroom.org/wiki/Articles_of_Association#Section_2.3_Benefits>
> .
>
> A colleague whom I met at the conference shared this paper with me, and
> I'd like to share it with y'all. The points made by Reagle are particularly
> relevant to the Sudo Room community:
>
> "Free as in Sexist?" Free Culture and the Gender Gap, by Joseph Reagle
> (2013)
> http://www.firstmonday.org/ojs/index.php/fm/article/view/4291/3381
>
> Happy to discuss further,
>  Jenny
> http://jennyryan.net
> http://thepyre.org
> http://thevirtualcampfire.org
> http://technomadic.tumblr.com
>
> `~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`
>  "Technology is the campfire around which we tell our stories."
> -Laurie Anderson
>
> "Storytelling reveals meaning without committing the error of defining it."
>  -Hannah Arendt
>
> "To define is to kill. To suggest is to create."
> -Stéphane Mallarmé
> ~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`
>
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>
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