[sudo-discuss] [omni-mediation] Today 4/4/15: Pidgen and Daren have been temp banned for safer spaces policy violations

Tue Apr 7 15:24:45 PDT 2015

Darin is being held accountable to all of us,
I say it like it is to Darin and he's working hard at mediation and
counseling.
That IS the process
Bans protect people and incentivize mediation.
Darin is already going through that mediation and should be given the
chance to be counseled and improve. Jumping in barely a couple weeks after
mediation has begun isnt giving him due time...

And others who have been hurt by Darin generally still come around and just
don't engage with him,
 in fact I hang out with such friends who were not scared away from the
space because of him
e.g. Babs when she's alone or with people who don't have conflict with
Darin,
 who see him pass and ignore him, as he does them. Because they do not fear
him,
Often it is other feelings, many others, including negative ones, I see,
but not fear of Darin
Until such time as Darin is ready to engage peacefully again, this is
sufficient to me...

But I do know there are people avoiding the space,
peaceful people never in conflict,
who are put off by your presence WildCat, and fearful of it...
...is that the power you want?

On Tue, Apr 7, 2015 at 9:10 AM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods at gmail.com>
wrote:

> Helen what is your alternative for accountability?
>
> On Tue, Apr 7, 2015 at 7:53 AM, Helen Finkelstein <hefinkel at gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
>> I strongly disagree.  Banning is too drastic a measure for the problems
>> that Darin has, and he has been making a serious effort to deal with them.
>>
>> There is long-standing hostility between Darin and Babs.   It would be a
>> mistake for the OMNI to get involved in it.   Darin, at least, just wants
>> to keep his distance.
>>
>> Helen
>>
>> On Sun, Apr 5, 2015 at 9:12 AM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods at gmail.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>>> There has been many attempts to mediate with Darin but still he is
>>> unaccountable. Therfore I think he needs  to be banned so that he can take
>>> these issues in his life a little more seriously. Helen what is the
>>> conflict that y'all are mediating?
>>>
>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 6:32 PM, Kevin Laird <thegayscience at gmail.com>
>>> wrote:
>>>
>>>> whoops. Always read to the end of the thread first...   -K
>>>>
>>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 6:32 PM, Kevin Laird <thegayscience at gmail.com>
>>>> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> I would speak with Darin. I would need to speak with whomever has been
>>>>> working with him in the past first, is there an extant point
>>>>> person/mediator/steward? Plz fwd me contacts or names.
>>>>>   tracy I understand your frustrations, and yours as well, cat person,
>>>>> but making the future happen requires a lot of patience!
>>>>>
>>>>>                 -K
>>>>>
>>>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 5:04 PM, niki <niki.shelley at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> Adding the mediation mailing list to this thread in the hopes that
>>>>>> someone will step forward to steward these conflicts towards whatever ends
>>>>>> are in the community's best interest.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> <3
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Niki
>>>>>>
>>>>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 3:37 PM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods at gmail.com
>>>>>> > wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> These are community issues not personal issues.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 2:53 PM, Tracy Jacobs <kinetical at comcast.net>
>>>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Sudoers,
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Respectfully can I suggest that you find another way to address
>>>>>>>> issues of a personal nature and character assassinations or public shaming
>>>>>>>> other than this public mailing list?  Why anyone would want to go to Sudo
>>>>>>>> room after reading this  mailing list is beyond my comprehension.  And it
>>>>>>>> really is a great place.  Can anyone think of another venue for these types
>>>>>>>> of discussions?
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Tracy
>>>>>>>> On Apr 4, 2015, at 2:41 PM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods at gmail.com>
>>>>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Daren returned to the space about 20 mins after trying to re-enter
>>>>>>>> and said to me " Do you want to go a couplwe blocks away from here and
>>>>>>>> handle this like an adult."
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Pidgen is claiming that I threatened her and I did tell her that
>>>>>>>> "you need to chill out or some shit is going to happen" but I also
>>>>>>>> clarified by saying "I am not threatening you with any form of violence."
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Darin is claiming that Babs sexually assaulted someone but Darin
>>>>>>>> did not give any details of what happened.
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> On Sat, Apr 4, 2015 at 2:00 PM, WIld Cat <
>>>>>>>> wildcatofthewoods at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Today Pidgen was asked to leave in violation of the safer spaces
>>>>>>>>> policy on an admitted account of sexual assault in the past as well as
>>>>>>>>> recent behaviors of harassment. Daren was asked to leave in violation of
>>>>>>>>> the safer spaces policy by aggressive  behavior (aggressive swearing,
>>>>>>>>> intentional misgendering, inappropriate sexual comments (Told me in an
>>>>>>>>> aggressive way that he liked phone sex, than began to yell at me.) He has
>>>>>>>>> had a history of being banned from spaces for similar behaviors of sexual
>>>>>>>>> harassment and inappropriate behavior.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> I would like to begin a mediation process for Daren and I do not
>>>>>>>>> feel safe with him being in the space during such process.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> To my knowledge there is an ongoing mediation between Pidgen and
>>>>>>>>> Centi. that Pidgen has allegedly violated due to harassing behavior. Pidgen
>>>>>>>>> has been banned from several other radical spaces for entitlement problems
>>>>>>>>> - theft - aggressive behaivor - accountability issues.
>>>>>>>>> I do not feel safe in the presences of Pidgen and would call on
>>>>>>>>> the community to permanently ban Pidgen.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>>> sudo-discuss mailing list
>>>>>>>> sudo-discuss at lists.sudoroom.org
>>>>>>>> https://lists.sudoroom.org/listinfo/sudo-discuss
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>> mediation mailing list
>>>>>> mediation at lists.omnicommons.org
>>>>>> https://omnicommons.org/lists/listinfo/mediation
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>> _______________________________________________
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>>> https://omnicommons.org/lists/listinfo/mediation
>>>
>>>
>>
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>
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-- 
<3 Rachel
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