27 Jun
2015
27 Jun
'15
12:10 a.m.
Please don't contact me off list about this. Boundaries.
Extremely aggressive: yelling at me repeatedly standing over me or from the
crow's nest about turning down the music, even when it was quiet enough
that I couldn't hear it over the person doing metal work, who was not asked
to cease.
And no, I couldn't have been "real with you" because of your repeated
boundary pushing and the fact that you honestly scare me. You've repeatedly
gotten in my physical space, and with your history of violence and the fact
that you've repeatedly raised your voice at me, it makes confrontation very
difficult. Generally, when I am feeling unsafe around someone, I work
towards non-interaction.
You do have the right to be "in a bad mood" at the Omni. You do not have
the right to use that as an excuse for shitty behavior towards others.
You talk about having to "hold the hand of your oppressor." Am I your
oppressor? If you were acting like this to me after I had repeatedly pushed
your buttons and exerted power over you, that'd be one thing. But your
interactions with pretty much everyone in the space are hostile, if not
overtly aggressive. You do realize that your body language is aggressive,
right?
However, I feel like I've said enough. You've taken enough of my emotional
energy on a day I don't have a lot of it. We can continue on with trying to
hash out exactly what happened, but at the end of the day, what matters is
that I am one of the many people who has felt threatened by you, to the
point of having to talk to other people about it.
You can keep making excuses, but there really is a pattern here.
On Fri, Jun 26, 2015 at 11:15 PM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods(a)gmail.com>
wrote:
Can you be more detailed about what extremely
aggressive means because I
feel like extremely aggressive is standing over someone or yelling at
someone. None of which I did. Also you could have been real with me and not
have waited till other people are attacking me for not compromising my
dignity in oppressive situations. I am not acting entitled I clean that
space on a near daily basis and have brought up my concerns and expressed
my opinion on how the collectives should act and every time the collectives
voted to ban these people. I am not the "enforcer" the collective decision
making bodies are. Do I have a right to not be in a great mood and be at
the omni? Is it ok to be upset or agry and not follow the politics of
respectability? Is it my responsibility to hold the hand of my oppresser? I
feel that the mediation process is working OK but its complicated. I
really appreciate the energy that people have put into community
accountability. Right now I am feeling a bit defensive because I feel that
people are pushing to ban me but I assure all of you that if you are real
with me and talk to me about accountability collectivly I will respect it.
I have not always seen eye to eye with certain individuals but if there is
a respectful effort I will return that respect.
On Friday, June 26, 2015, Ryan <yandoryn(a)gmail.com> wrote:
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Let's be clear.
You went into a space where many people were listening to and enjoying
loud music. You then snapped at me to turn it down (which I did... three
times) and were extremely aggressive in doing so. There were many other
places you could have been if you were in pain. Your aggression was to the
point that I had to remove myself and decompress with other people.
In fact, you went into a space that is specifically a space where loud
noises, including woodworking, metalworking, giant robots working, and loud
music, expecting that everyone would accommodate your headache. That's not
reasonable. If you want to be somewhere that's more headache friendly, you
could have gone into La Commune, the mezzanine, or the treatment room. The
blue classroom tends to be quieter as well. Also, the basement.
You didn't have to be there. And if you were in so much pain that you
couldn't act reasonably, you shouldn't have been at the Omni at all. You
are not entitled to the space. No one is so entitled to the space that they
get to be aggressive towards others, to the point that they feel physically
unsafe. Considering your history of physical violence against others in the
space, you really need to work on that.
This kind of exactly proves my point. Almost all of the button pushing
and aggressive behaviors you exhibit, you have an excuse for. Or your story
doesn't match up with everyone else's at all. It doesn't matter if you keep
"taking accountability" and apologizing. There's a point where that
doesn't
matter because you're regularly hurting other people and not seeming to do
anything to modify those patterns of behavior.
On Fri, Jun 26, 2015 at 9:12 PM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods(a)gmail.com>
wrote:
I am sorry that I made you feel uncomfortable
that day I had a head ache
and you were blasting techno. Whenever anyone has asked me to turn down
some music I have. I communicated my wish with what I thought was
respectful but I was in pain. Behaviors that are deniable. I'm confused. I
just feel like while I am doing my best to be accountable and I took some
very serious steps to do so. I don't feel like people are aknowledging the
many good thing for that space.
On Friday, June 26, 2015, Ryan <yandoryn(a)gmail.com> wrote:
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Please actually read the emails.
She has been asked to leave without attempts at reconciliation at this
time.
However, please acknowledge that this isn't about tokenization. You are
a button pusher and aggressive. You are constantly inserting yourself where
it isn't appropriate, pushing boundaries, and making demands on others
without thinking about the consequences for them in these actions. I'm not
saying that she isn't rude or transphobic. What others are saying is that
you escalate. You push people and push people.
Honestly, I think you should be asked to leave. Not about this. About a
pattern of shitty and even threatening behavior against multiple people
when you don't agree with them or aren't getting what you want. If you
*were* a member of sudo room, you would likely no longer be a member
in good standing.
Fuck, you intentionally pushed my buttons when I didn't immediately
turn my music off when you asked me to turn it down. You are manipulative.
And I feel that you intentionally choose behaviors that are deniable, which
is so fucking abusive, even if you aren't aware of it.
On Fri, Jun 26, 2015 at 12:22 PM, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods(a)gmail.com
> wrote:
> And she attacked me in the street I think she should be banned if not
> it ain't a safer space. Also she has attacked two other people. Don't try
> to make this about race Niki. This is I give her shade because she is
> aggressive, messy, rude, violent, and transphobic
>
>
> On Friday, June 26, 2015, WIld Cat <wildcatofthewoods(a)gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
>> Niki honestly I think you are tokenizing Rannette if anyone else was
>> being as problematic and aggressive as she has been to many people in the
>> space people would call it put. It ain't micro aggressions she has always
>> acted rude and transphobic to me from day one. But I guess you can tokenize
>> her and say just because she is black it is pk to be transphobic. I know
>> plenty of black trans women and black trans allies that would not put up
>> with her.
>>
>> On Thursday, June 25, 2015, niki <niki.shelley(a)gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>> I don't believe we have an explicit policy re: cops but we should
>>> probably articulate one.
>>>
>>> Regarding this particular conflict, I just went and met with
>>> Ranette.
>>>
>>> First of all, I want it to be 100% clear that this email is not
>>> meant to condone Ranette's behavior or the ways in which she handles
>>> confrontation or engages in transphobic attacks.
>>>
>>> That said, oftentimes the most insidious and persistent forms of
>>> abuse and oppression are not as obvious as a violent outburst. These are
>>> the forms of abuse and oppression most instrumentalized by dominant culture
>>> and they are consistently employed in order to control oppressed
>>> populations.
>>>
>>> You, Morgan, need to accept accountability for continuing to engage
>>> in provocative micro-aggressions and gaslighting - particularly with those
>>> who are different from you and who may not possess the best coping
>>> mechanisms / most radical politics. I really believe that you intentionally
>>> push people you don't like and who you know will react badly in an
attempt
>>> to get them banned from the space.
>>>
>>> I'd like to also ask that you think about the ways in which you
>>> repeatedly police people in the space in ways such as inserting yourself
>>> into private phone conversations.
>>>
>>> We don't need cops, we need people who are compassionate towards one
>>> another's differences and who are willing to work through those
differences
>>> to arrive at some kind of common ground.
>>>
>>> I don't personally know that reconciliation is possible either at
>>> this time, given our limited capacities and the level of aggression with
>>> which Ranette has responded however, I believe your behavior to be a major
>>> part of the problem.
>>>
>>> Another issue is the fact that the Omni is pretty maxed out with
>>> regards to our capacity for conflict mediation / resolution at the moment.
>>> Both Morgan and Ranette told me that they'd asked for mediation from
>>> several people including the mediation mailing list and no one ever
>>> followed up with either of them. I don't really know what to do about
this
>>> but it should be made clear to members of our community that they cannot
>>> rely on us at the time for mediation / resolution.
>>>
>>> I told Ranette I would inquire about mediation. Obviously others
>>> involved in this conflict must be willing to participate, a well if
there's
>>> to be any kind of resolution, which, I understand, some might not be
>>> interested in pursing.
>>>
>>> N
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> On Wed, Jun 24, 2015 at 10:08 PM, max cadji <
>>> max(a)phatbeetsproduce.org> wrote:
>>>
>>>> Does omni have a no police policy?
>>>>
>>>> max
>>>>
>>>> On Wed, Jun 24, 2015 at 4:56 PM, Pete Forsyth <
>>>> peteforsyth(a)gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> On Wed, Jun 24, 2015 at 4:38 PM, Julio Rios
<julio.rios(a)gmail.com>
>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> I urge we don't involve the police though.
>>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> Just a quick point of clarification -- I wasn't urging Sudo or
>>>>> Omni to do so, but any *individual* who feels threatened. (And
actually,
>>>>> just urging them to consider it as a viable option...I'm not
confident to
>>>>> recommend anything specific, as my info is limited.)
>>>>>
>>>>> Pete
>>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> --
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>>>> <http://www.phatbeetsproduce.org/order-a-beet-box-csa/>
>>>> 510-250-7957
>>>> ...connecting small farmers of color to urban communities
>>>>
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>>>>
>>>>
>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>> discuss mailing list
>>>> discuss(a)lists.omnicommons.org
>>>> https://omnicommons.org/lists/listinfo/discuss
>>>>
>>>>
>>>
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